Lost opportunities

What we get in life is just according to our prarabhad  ( प्रारभ्ध ) ! several opportunities come in the life but we get what is reserved for us. At this stage of life, in retirement when I go back to the life journey, I find that I lost many very good opportunities , here I would like to give a few important ones which have changed the direction and the situation ( दिशा तथा दशा ) of my life .
1. ACADEMIC opportunity with BHU:
I was a very favourite student of Prof. Rathor , who was my guide also for my M.Sc. Thesis. I was his  most trusted student ( He gave me even an examination  Question Paper to set for final examination on his behalf) .Prof Rathor wanted me to join the Department as Assistant Professor and simultaneously register for the Ph.D research. He even discussed the topic for Ph.D. work and the whole process of completing the work and also the future academic program and career. I would have been certainly benefitted  under his  care  and my future would have been safe and successful under his  guidance. I would have been a faculty of a very prestigious University not only of India but of the world. A house on the campus, academic environment and an institution with full of  activities. etc etc. I missed the opportunity. DESTINY never wanted me to go that way.

2. HIGHER EDUCATION in Canada :

My external examiner for my M.Sc. Thesis was Prof A.E. Beck, Professor and Head of the Department of Geophysics, University of Western Ontario, London, Canada. He was very much impressed with my thesis work and invited me to work with him for a Ph.D. program. He was quite keen and interested  that I should join his Department. I missed the great opportunity by declining his offer as  my own priorities and responsibilities at that time were different and forced me to take that action. When I think about that opportunity now living in Canada as what could have been my life and career if I would have come to Canada in 1961 ( almost 60 years ago). Unthinkable and unimaginable . Lost the opportunity . DESTINY never wanted my life to be that way.


3. ONGC:
I joined ONGC in 1961 with my first attempt of interview. Dr. Hari Narain, One of the Superintending Geophysicist ( SG) , next to the Director, Mr. B.S.Negi in seniority was the Chairman of the interview Board, Mr. Sengupta, and Prof. Amlendu Roy were the other members of the Board. During the interview process , Dr. Hari Narain asked me to show the copy of  my M.Sc. Thesis to him and all the members of the board, complimenting my work that this report has given the idea of the Offshore prospecting  about which even ONGC did not know so far. He further told that he was the examiner of this thesis work and he was very much impressed with it and thinking to write to the Department of Geophysics, BHU that he wanted to see me.
I was selected and enjoyed working with ONGC till December 1976 in different positions, different kinds of responsibilities , doing different kinds of work; Obtained very rich experience . Describing my work and experience will take very long space here, hence some other time and in another context. ONGC is and was the best organization in India to work. . My Director, Shri S.N. Talukdar was not happy that I was leaving ONGC and even mentioned that if I wish he could get the whole process reversed for me to join back. Any way, now when I see my friends and colleagues who retired from ONGC, nicely settled with all the facilities one could think of, I feel I committed a mistake. I came later in 1980 to visit India and went to see Mr Talukdar . In fact he really helped me out of way  to get my Visa for Nigeria. He invited me for the breakfast at his home, though I was little shy to be with such a high ranking person, I visited him at his home; He was then Member Exploration and told me that if I was still interested to come back to ONGC. He will fix me with proper rank and salary etc. Also mentioned the concept of Voltage and Amperage  (Power and Income); He gave me time to think about it. I declined the offer and certainly lost the opportunity to work for ONGC and enjoy the life in my retirement like my friends.  DESTINY never wanted me to live that kind of life.

4. LAND in DehraDun:

I have been looking for a small piece of land to construct a house. I got a very good deal and arranged the land for my friends and well wishers; The plots were taken by Mr. Talukdar, Mr Mathur, Mr.MC Agarwal, Mr. MP. Agarwal, Mr Chaudhry and me; it was a great location on EC Road , very near to MKP College ; I decided to go to Nigeria hence returned all the papers for buying the land , deciding not to buy the land. Others constructed nice houses and enjoyed living in DehraDun: The cost of land appreciated not hundreds of time but thousands of time because of Uttrakhand and its capital as DehraDun , Lost opportunity;

Another land piece just by the side of my younger brother , Mohan was available to me through Pradeep Gupta : Mohan took half the land for Rs.20,000/- and the double of it on the corner side ( roads on three sides while Mohan had only on one side) was offered to me for Rs.40,000/- not grabbed , recently sold for Rs. 10 Lakhs. Lost opportunity; 

Thus, lost academic opportunities to get better qualifications and career  ( Twice) ; Lost my wonderful career with ONGC; ( Twice ); also lost financial gain opportunities by not having land in DehraDun ( twice); Well, I very strongly believe in  DESTINEY which carried me along as it was decided.

Regret; खेद, ; my younger brother

One of my younger brother is left behind all of us for whatever reasons.
At time, I wondered as how he is going to manage his day to day affair when he took voluntary retirement from a dying corporation. He must have got some savings, some money in his CFP and other benefits etc. but that money will loose its value in future and making it worthless. Not that it will loose its value, even that will not be enough. One can see it now as the value of money in 1980, 1990, 2000, 2010 and now simply paper.
I was worried about his old age when he will need more resources for the health problems which are bound to come to all of us. Medical expenses for medicines, medical procedures in hospitals and time to time check ups are huge and they would not be covered by the corporation which is already dead, not existing at all.
For the children, son and daughter , it is not easy to support the parents from their limited income and means and managing the affairs of their own families. They can support their parents only if they have health coverage for their parents from their employers.

During 1970s , I had good relationships with the management of ONGC , even later after I left ONGC, I had very good contacts ( even some of my colleagues became the part of management), I could have easily fixed him  in some job/position according to his qualifications and experience . The main advantage could have been the medical support for his family for the rest of his life- a big relief.
Just like many other things, it never occured to me to act in that direction and I add another regret in the list of my regrets of life.
In a previous blog, I wrote regret not doing any thing for my parents;https://www.blogger.com/u/1/blogger.g?blogID=7434278182063497637#editor/target=post;postID=3648407691673034737;onPublishedMenu=allposts;onClosedMenu=allposts;postNum=5;src=postname

EMOTIONAL Moment; Going to Nigeria

In another blog, I wrote another emtional moment of my parents.
https://www.blogger.com/u/1/blogger.g?blogID=7434278182063497637#editor/target=post;postID=8585261243208826873;onPublishedMenu=allposts;onClosedMenu=allposts;postNum=3;src=postname

December 1976, I wound up my job with ONGC and my living from DehraDun. For winding up process, I was so busy and things were messed up that I could not call my mother to stay with us for some time. While going by train from DehraDun to Delhi to join my job in Nigeria, my mother came to see us at JWALAPUR railway station  ( she was living with my younger brother- Lakshmi Narain in Jwalapur that time ; perhaps, he was working in BHEL for HSCL ).
My mother was almost crying like a cow separated from  her calf. The train was moving and she was going along with it. It was very emotional event for me. It always remain in my memory.

Regret : पश्चाताप

कभी कभी , कल्पना तथा विचारों में  खो जाता हूँ !  पुराना समय  स्मरण हो जाता है ! 

कल सोच रहा था कि १९६१ से १९७३ तक, १२ वर्षों में ,मैं ONGC में, उस समय के अनुसार उचित पद पर उचित वेतन पर कार्य करता था! इस बीच में,मैं  देहरादून, मद्रास, करैकाल, बरोदा, जोधपुर आदि कई स्थानों पर रह कर कार्य करता था! कभी विचार नहीं आया  कि माता पित्ता को भी वोह सब स्थान कियों नहीं घुमा दिए ! कभी भी, कहीं से , कुत्छ भी नहीं लाया उनके लिए! एक पाजामा, एक, कमीज या कोइ अन्य वस्तु - कुत्छ भी नहीं लाया, कुत्छ भी नहीं दिया, कुत्छ भी नहीं किया उनके लिए ! पिता जी के लिए केवल , उनके अंतिम समय में  ( कियोंके  उनके पास वोह भी नहीं थे ) दो बनयान, अस्पताल में, ले कर आया ! दुर्भाग्य  है , सब कुत्छ होते हुवे भी कुत्छ नहीं कर पाया! आज, बहुत खेद होता है!

इस खेद का का कुत्छ उपचार , निदान हो सकता है?? 

स्म्भाव्ते नहीं, सब    कार्य  अपने  समय से होते हैं! 

one could easily give some excuses of having limited means, money and housing etc. but when other things in day to day life are managed , why not this could also be accomodated. It is a matter of attitude, emotional intelligence at that particular time or period. It simply does not occur to us to think in that direction.

I can think of  main reasons for such kind of situation :

During the age 25-50 years- known as Grahast Ashram, individuals are busy and focused in SELF DEVELOPMENT; career development ; most important in life for sustaining and living a comfortable life ; family development; a natural process designed by God to protect HIS creation- most important responsibility and duty from social, religious and all othe points of view. One has to look after the welfare and development of children so that they can  perform the best in their Brahamcharya Ashram to stand in llife independently. In this process of self development , individuals are so much involved that they can not think of other obligations  for the family or the society. Though, one is not supposed to do much for the society during this period ( from the age 50-75, we have Van Prasath Ashram to meet these obligations)  but one must think a litttle bit of parents especially if they need our support and help. They have done all that for us what we have been doing or wish to do for our children; Our parents must have expected some thing from us as we do from our children.

In fact, we must analyse and assess/ evaluate at time to time at every stage in our life  as what are we supposed  for the individuals - family members, friends and others in the society around

us. We have certain obligations yet to be met.

I have written some of my regrets in earlier blog also;https://www.blogger.com/u/1/blogger.g?blogID=7434278182063497637#editor/target=post;postID=7011055118277005336;onPublishedMenu=allposts;onClosedMenu=allposts;postNum=6;src=postname

Emotional moments of my parents

It was December, 1966 that I was leaving for Madras/Karaikal to work with electrical prospecting party of ONGC. My parents came to visit us in DehraDun.  During those days, there used to be a very few buses for Delhi from DehraDun; Bus stand was also almost on the roadside near Lakshmi talkies.Malanki was only a few months old- a loving child. My parents were very emotional on our departure to Madras, they did not like that we should go that far with our so little child; standing by the side of the bus both were crying and my father was even more emotional with his tears in his eys and crying; they were very sad as the bus left. They were supposed to catch their own train after some time from the Railway station which was near to Bus stand.
It was really a very touchy moment for me. How much love, they had for their grandson. Ofcourse, he was the first grandchild in the family . I never saw my parents so emotional before. We left for Delhi/Madras with very heavy heart.

Whatever has to happen, will happen

Posted on April 8, 2015

Destiny is very strong which guides and controls all our decisions and actions. Although according to typical human nature, we think that we are in control of our actions and events, and we can change them with our efforts, but this is not so.
There are many such stories given in the literature. A recently published book by Sushma Gupta; https://www.scribd.com/doc/254965698/Whatever-Has-to-Happen lists a few such stories  showing that Destiny is much greater than man-made efforts.

Well those are stories taken from books, but here, I wish to narrate a true incident of my own experience. It was 1962 when I was working in a field party of ONGC and that was my first job and assignment with ONGC. We were working in Moradabad and Badaun Districts of Uttar Pradesh. Mr. P. N. S.Chauhan was one of our party members and was working as a field surveyor. Initially, I was living with him and another surveyor, Mr. Tuteja. Mr Chauhan was a very nice person with all the good traits – personal and professional.
It was the month of May, peak of the summer and we were camping in a garden near Bhakarauli, Badaun. One day Mr Chauhan was looking very sad and worried. On asking he told that he knew that in the same month he was going to die in an accident.

We did not believe him and laughed at it. He took all kinds of precautions not to involve in any kind of accident. He pitched his tent outside the garden to avoid the fall of the tree, although it was very hot outside. He would not light the lamp inside the tent to avoid any fire accident. (We had already witnessed a fire accident in the camp in the month of January when the tent and belongings of one party member, Mr Sharma, were completely destroyed). He was not only taking these precautions but he did not marry also for this reason only.

Mr Saxena, our Party Chief, was kind enough to give him rest from the field work so that he could avoid any kind of accident in the field or while traveling in the jeep or anywhere else. Mr Chauhan became very quiet and was not talking to any one. He would like to be alone; very careful in his actions to avoid any kind of accident. He would go for evening walk alone and sit down on a culvert on the road side. The traffic on the road was almost negligible especially in the evening.
The final day to meet his destiny was coming nearer. He was sitting on the culvert as usual. Normally, no body used to go out of the camp for any work or duty in the evening. But this evening, as the Destiny of Chauhan had decided, Mr KC Saha, one of our party members was going to Moradabad for certain work. It was only one and a half hour drive from the camp. So Mr Saha would come back to Camp within four hours or so.

Mr. Saha insisted Mr Chauhan to accompany him for this short trip. Mr. Chauhan tried his best to avoid this trip and convince Mr Saha not to accompany him for the said reason but Mr Saha dragged him to the jeep to accompany him. To meet his destiny and the bad luck, he joined him in the jeep taking the outer front seat.

After an hour, it became dark, jeep was in its full speed and then there was a road cut to build a culvert there. There was no sign posts for the repair of the road. It was dark, driver could not see the ditch ahead. The jeep fell in the ditch.

The jeep was completely destroyed in the accident. The driver and Mr Saha were injured badly and were admitted in Moradabad Hospital but poor Chauhan could not escape his death from the accident. Since, he was sitting on the outer seat of the jeep, he was thrown out with a big thrust, died on the spot, perhaps instantly.

Later when we got the news from one truck driver going on that route, we sent a rescue party; could help the other party members but we could not do anything for Mr. Chauhan as he was already dead.
Mr. Chauhan took all the precautions but destiny had its own plan and he could not save himself from it in spite of all the precautions.So, whatever was to happen, happened.

My visit to Assam

I was working with Institute of Petroleum Exploration (=IPE) , ONGC at DehraDun after September 1969 when I joined the Training and Documentation Division of IPE as Scientific Officer (Documentation); Being out of exploration activities, there was no chance to visit Assam.Fortunately, I got a new friend in Janak Raj Sharma who was working with very important Department of Human Resources Study Group ( Headed by Mr. Dhir) with other members- K.G.Gupta, Mr. Chawla and Shukla etc. JR was with me doing computer training organised by ISI in Delhi in 1970 . JR was very resourceful person in Tel Bhavan. I casually mentioned to him some times that I wish to visit Assam as it would not be possible now for me to visit that place as I have no relevant assignment to go  there. During my exploration job, I was fortunate to work for different kind of exploration methods like Gravity & Magnetic (=GM), Electrical , Seismic etc, and visit very different kinds of places in North, West and South etc but missed eastern part of India.
It was in 1971, that JR managed to get an assignment for me from his Department.They used to conduct a competitive Examination for Probationary Officers for ONGC at different centres in India. He got me the assignment to conduct and coordinate the examination at Nazira Centre in Assam. Great opportunity for me. Went through Calcutta  to Jorhat by air for the first time. It was great experience to travel by air for the first time. It was very small plane flying at very low altitudes with all kinds of turbulence. Also an opportunity to revisit Calcutta after a long time.
I got Nazira by road. Mr. AP Ghosh was the Manager at Nazira and he provided me all the best facilities to get me from Jorhat, guest house and rest of the things. The great opportunity was to go around with a restriction to Nagaland. Lot of rains, shorter day than DehraDun was not unexpected experience but to witness the green tea gardens and the beautiful topography of valleys and hills with dense forests with betel nut  (supari ) trees and meeting the people of entirely different culture, girls with beautiful dresses of silk and bright colours..It was an exciting and unforgettable experience. It gave me an impression as I was not in India but in some other country ( so different from the rest of the country). Almost each house is made of bamboos with a fish pond and a small rice field, so self sufficient to live with their own resources. For the first time, I tasted the green fermented supari- so intoxicating..
Thanks to my friend JR Sharma to arrange this visit and Shri AP Ghosh to make my visit to Assam so meaningful by providing all the appropriate facilities.