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In general, the status of women in our society used to be very poor which of course has changed and improved a lot of recently with new developments in women education, awareness of rights, changing socio-economic environment in new trend of globalization, media etc.The status of daughters/ girls in our family , not of women ( daughter-in-laws ) , if I look back to several generations back was very poor. I could recollect the data upto the generation of my grandfather; My grandfather were five brothers and only one sister- RAM KATORI, married in Nehtaur; now completely forgotten family.I wonder if anyone knows about her and her family? I observed ( during my childhood time ) that out of five brothers, she used to come to only our place at least once in a year. She used to come by herself alone , perhaps without any invitation or escort. She had two sons, I never saw the elder one, Shri Musaddi Lal ji, though I knew and met several times the younger one- Shri Damodar Das as he used to live with his sister, Smt Daropdi Devi in Chandpur. We knew Buwaji, the daughter of Dadiji and her family as they lived in Chandpur. We had very close contact with them. I wonder if any of her brother cared for her not that they did not love her. Perhaps, she was the next to my grandfather ?
In the next generation of my father, the three brothers had one sister, CHAMELI DEVI, Married to Shri Ram Kumar Arya, Dhampur. The same story with her. I never observed that she ever visited her two other brothers, she used to visit only to our home in Jhalu, alone ; I never saw Phupaji visiting anyone in our family.She is also forgotten and her family is simply not known to most of us except my younger brother, Lakshmi Narain who lived with her for some time. I wonder if Rakesh or Dinesh know her and her family at all. I wonder if the same situation remains with the daughter of other grandfathers; though I know , Smt Sumarni Devi , daughter of Shri Chhangi Mal ji; and some of the daughters of Shri Behari Lal ji, especially Gyan Buwaji who used to live in Bijnor. Indraji, Kamlaji and Ramlaji, three daughters of Shri Har Prasad ji were quite known to many of us as that family was most visible
Among five of us, we had two sisters; One is dead prematurely and another younger one is widowed about two years now. Let us evaluate their situation; Lakshmi and her family is almost forgotten except for special occasions; Nobody cares for them; I am not saying about the reasons as why is it so.
With the exception of special occasion like wedding , daughters in our family were not seen much.
In my next generation, we have Sapna and her brother Sameer; Manish and his sister Radha and Ankur and his sister Dolly.Considering the effect of globalization, limitation of time with individuals, increasing distances and personal problems and priorities, I wonder that situation would be any better of our daughters in the family.
Cousins are cousins, who cares for them, relationship with them is very loose and fragile and fades away with time.
During our generation, Time was not the constraint; everyone had enough time for each other; Distances were small, most of the relatives used to live within 50 miles or less; most of the relatives were known to each other very well and closely; visits were quite frequent and very routinely on special occasions and festivals, though the means of transportation were very poor- Bullock carts or motors lorries on some routes , if not every day, once in a week or so. Fairs and festivals were the occasions when people used to meet each other.
In the next generation of my father, the three brothers had one sister, CHAMELI DEVI, Married to Shri Ram Kumar Arya, Dhampur. The same story with her. I never observed that she ever visited her two other brothers, she used to visit only to our home in Jhalu, alone ; I never saw Phupaji visiting anyone in our family.She is also forgotten and her family is simply not known to most of us except my younger brother, Lakshmi Narain who lived with her for some time. I wonder if Rakesh or Dinesh know her and her family at all. I wonder if the same situation remains with the daughter of other grandfathers; though I know , Smt Sumarni Devi , daughter of Shri Chhangi Mal ji; and some of the daughters of Shri Behari Lal ji, especially Gyan Buwaji who used to live in Bijnor. Indraji, Kamlaji and Ramlaji, three daughters of Shri Har Prasad ji were quite known to many of us as that family was most visible
Among five of us, we had two sisters; One is dead prematurely and another younger one is widowed about two years now. Let us evaluate their situation; Lakshmi and her family is almost forgotten except for special occasions; Nobody cares for them; I am not saying about the reasons as why is it so.
With the exception of special occasion like wedding , daughters in our family were not seen much.
In my next generation, we have Sapna and her brother Sameer; Manish and his sister Radha and Ankur and his sister Dolly.Considering the effect of globalization, limitation of time with individuals, increasing distances and personal problems and priorities, I wonder that situation would be any better of our daughters in the family.
Cousins are cousins, who cares for them, relationship with them is very loose and fragile and fades away with time.
During our generation, Time was not the constraint; everyone had enough time for each other; Distances were small, most of the relatives used to live within 50 miles or less; most of the relatives were known to each other very well and closely; visits were quite frequent and very routinely on special occasions and festivals, though the means of transportation were very poor- Bullock carts or motors lorries on some routes , if not every day, once in a week or so. Fairs and festivals were the occasions when people used to meet each other.
our daughters have been very affectionate and loving; they have been vey useful to the family; Grandfather, Shri Bihari Lal ji studied living with his sister in Nehtaur for his high school and secondary education, later to study engineering at Roorkee. In those days , our town had only primary education; His whole family's progress owe to her; Gultoo lived and studied with our Buwa; Mohan and Rajo lived and studied with their sister, Lakshmi; Sapna lived and studied with he Buwa, Rajo in Sahranpur; We all owe to them for their help at times when most needed.
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